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nuraichaHello!
Today I was going to post only the next entry of the music meme, but I've been having these thoughts nagging me for ages and I've decided to write about it here, because two reasons: a) people isn't as harsh as it can be on Tumblr and b) I prefer the format and the less potential number of readers.
Therefore, I am going to talk about fandom. After months of thought, I've arrived to the conclusion that fandom life both fills and sucks your life out of you. Is this good? Probably not. Do we care? Absolutely not. Should we care? It depends on the case.
I've heard lots of times people saying 'fandom saved my life' and it has always slightly surprised me. Could a fandom, a passion you share with people, save your life? It seems so, if we listen to these people. In my case, I've learned I can live without fandom, but not without a passion. Living without things that passionate me, that would be impossible. I even think I might die if that was the case.
However, I think fandom can be replaced, even if it depends on the kind of person you are. In my case, I've lived without fandom all my life and I have been very happy, although I admit I've had my moments of needing someone to share my passions with, and whenever I found that person, it was simply magnificient.
When I entered the fandom life, around 2012, I considered it one of the best things of my life. Meeting people who shared my same interests, talking with people of all across the world, making new friendships, feeling completely part of something. Nevertheless, nowadays I'm starting to dislike all my fandoms. Don't get me wrong, I still love my passions with all my heart, but I've been feeling detached of the fandom life lately.
The question is, why? I've been searching all my life for people who would understand me, and now that I've found them, I just want to isolate myself from them.
Well, the answer is: fandom can be a very cruel and tough world, as you can see everyday on Tumblr or Twitter. It's a world full of wanks, ship wars, cliques and closed minded people. How can that be if us, the people who are fans of something in a passionate way (nearly obsessive sometimes), usually tend to be people who are social introverts and unconventional, at least in some ways? Why members of a fandom start throwing daggers at each other?
Honestly, I can't understand the reason, but this is one of the main reasons I'm not into the Sherlock or Doctor Who fandom anymore. You can find people there who are a real treasure, with whom you can share your opinions in a totally relaxed way, but also beasts whose brain is a one-way road. And I can't stand that. I've made whovian friends on Twitter I don't even talk anymore about Doctor Who with them because they're so focused in their opinions until a point it becomes painful to me. I consider myself a very neutral and open minded person, who can stand everyone's point and be respectful about that, but I can't stand if they make hurtful comments on something I love: you can not believe in Doctor/Master, but don't treat me as I am verging on madness for thinking the Master is the first love of the Doctor because you're hurting me that way.
Another fandom whom I have trouble with, even if they don't hurt me in such a deep way (really, people, don't joke with Doctor/Master when you're with me), is the Muse fandom (now is when all my friends here unfriend me, isn't it?). Really, people there is so closed minded! I've seen people on Twitter dismissing other Muse fans for liking certain songs and not others, and I've been receiving hurtful comments (even if I doubt the people who said them thought they were hurting me on purpose, just expressing their surprise) about my condition as a Muse fan ('why don't you like this song', 'why they aren't your favourite band', etc.). No, people, I don't consider myself a muser (here I should explain my name's theory but it's too long) and they aren't my favourite band and I don't know every detail of their life and miracles. They're just another band, very good and very important for me (I owe them lot of things, as friendships and inspiration writing-wise), but just another band I listen to. Everyone is different, don't ever forget that, and I am not less of you for not having one to 100000 concerts or starting listening to them in June.
A good deal of times I've been thinking of quiting, stop following musers on Twitter and leaving Muse Slash because I've suffered real mental pain since I'm in this dandom. Most of it it's all my fault, me fighting against my own demons and facing aspects of myself I haven't encountered in so long.
I don't know, maybe my mother is right and I should grow up and stop being passionate about things, acting my age and not doing crazy things for the stuff I love. But I can't do that, it'd end with me. I have arrived to the conclusion the principal source of problem are my own demons, and not the people, at least in some fandoms. I think I should be away of the stuff that hurts me and stop giving importance to things that don't deserve it.
Lately I've been thinking I need a rebirth. I hope I can do that some day (![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
snowgrouse, send me the Master).
PS: I am talking in general. I repeat, IN GENERAL. If any of you feel affronted by any of this, please talk to me face to face and we'll sort our problems.
PS2: If you didn't notice, I opened my heart here. Treat carefully, I won't tolerate harsh comments.
Today I was going to post only the next entry of the music meme, but I've been having these thoughts nagging me for ages and I've decided to write about it here, because two reasons: a) people isn't as harsh as it can be on Tumblr and b) I prefer the format and the less potential number of readers.
Therefore, I am going to talk about fandom. After months of thought, I've arrived to the conclusion that fandom life both fills and sucks your life out of you. Is this good? Probably not. Do we care? Absolutely not. Should we care? It depends on the case.
I've heard lots of times people saying 'fandom saved my life' and it has always slightly surprised me. Could a fandom, a passion you share with people, save your life? It seems so, if we listen to these people. In my case, I've learned I can live without fandom, but not without a passion. Living without things that passionate me, that would be impossible. I even think I might die if that was the case.
However, I think fandom can be replaced, even if it depends on the kind of person you are. In my case, I've lived without fandom all my life and I have been very happy, although I admit I've had my moments of needing someone to share my passions with, and whenever I found that person, it was simply magnificient.
When I entered the fandom life, around 2012, I considered it one of the best things of my life. Meeting people who shared my same interests, talking with people of all across the world, making new friendships, feeling completely part of something. Nevertheless, nowadays I'm starting to dislike all my fandoms. Don't get me wrong, I still love my passions with all my heart, but I've been feeling detached of the fandom life lately.
The question is, why? I've been searching all my life for people who would understand me, and now that I've found them, I just want to isolate myself from them.
Well, the answer is: fandom can be a very cruel and tough world, as you can see everyday on Tumblr or Twitter. It's a world full of wanks, ship wars, cliques and closed minded people. How can that be if us, the people who are fans of something in a passionate way (nearly obsessive sometimes), usually tend to be people who are social introverts and unconventional, at least in some ways? Why members of a fandom start throwing daggers at each other?
Honestly, I can't understand the reason, but this is one of the main reasons I'm not into the Sherlock or Doctor Who fandom anymore. You can find people there who are a real treasure, with whom you can share your opinions in a totally relaxed way, but also beasts whose brain is a one-way road. And I can't stand that. I've made whovian friends on Twitter I don't even talk anymore about Doctor Who with them because they're so focused in their opinions until a point it becomes painful to me. I consider myself a very neutral and open minded person, who can stand everyone's point and be respectful about that, but I can't stand if they make hurtful comments on something I love: you can not believe in Doctor/Master, but don't treat me as I am verging on madness for thinking the Master is the first love of the Doctor because you're hurting me that way.
Another fandom whom I have trouble with, even if they don't hurt me in such a deep way (really, people, don't joke with Doctor/Master when you're with me), is the Muse fandom (now is when all my friends here unfriend me, isn't it?). Really, people there is so closed minded! I've seen people on Twitter dismissing other Muse fans for liking certain songs and not others, and I've been receiving hurtful comments (even if I doubt the people who said them thought they were hurting me on purpose, just expressing their surprise) about my condition as a Muse fan ('why don't you like this song', 'why they aren't your favourite band', etc.). No, people, I don't consider myself a muser (here I should explain my name's theory but it's too long) and they aren't my favourite band and I don't know every detail of their life and miracles. They're just another band, very good and very important for me (I owe them lot of things, as friendships and inspiration writing-wise), but just another band I listen to. Everyone is different, don't ever forget that, and I am not less of you for not having one to 100000 concerts or starting listening to them in June.
A good deal of times I've been thinking of quiting, stop following musers on Twitter and leaving Muse Slash because I've suffered real mental pain since I'm in this dandom. Most of it it's all my fault, me fighting against my own demons and facing aspects of myself I haven't encountered in so long.
I don't know, maybe my mother is right and I should grow up and stop being passionate about things, acting my age and not doing crazy things for the stuff I love. But I can't do that, it'd end with me. I have arrived to the conclusion the principal source of problem are my own demons, and not the people, at least in some fandoms. I think I should be away of the stuff that hurts me and stop giving importance to things that don't deserve it.
Lately I've been thinking I need a rebirth. I hope I can do that some day (
snowgrouse, send me the Master).PS: I am talking in general. I repeat, IN GENERAL. If any of you feel affronted by any of this, please talk to me face to face and we'll sort our problems.
PS2: If you didn't notice, I opened my heart here. Treat carefully, I won't tolerate harsh comments.
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no subject
Date: 2014-12-30 05:42 pm (UTC)I so totally understand what your saying here. I do consider myself a muser. Not so much to identify with other people, but because of my deep felt love for Muse. I'm positive other musers wouldn't consider me a muser though. I don't know all lyrics by heart, I don't even know all song titles or what album they're on. To me, my feeling like a muser isn't about that at all. It's about a passion I have discovered through their music. It touches me on a level I never experienced before and can't explain. Yes, I met new people all over the world because of this fandom, but I consider my muserdom something private. And yes, people in a fandom can be very narrow minded indeed. It's a shame ... It really shouldn't matter if you're a fan from the start or just recently. It shouldn't matter if you like certain songs, but not others. I guess people are just wired that way, to feel more important and better than others. It is sad. It should be about sharing the same passion.
no subject
Date: 2015-01-01 08:23 pm (UTC)a) I identify that term with the kind of harsh people I have seen in fandom (clearly not your case, but I bet you know what kind of people I'm talking about).
b) Because no, simply no. I don't feel identified with that name, I don't have a connection with it. Why? Who knows, difficult to explain even to myself.
But, do all of that mean I don't love them? Of course no, but I am sure many people would think that. It makes me furious!
So sorry for all the ranting, as you see, this is a topic that wires me. I agree with you, and I understand you. Thankfully you can always find people who think alike, like you :)